| FILE SCAVENGER- DATA RECOVERY UTILITY- CHECK IT OUT | for everyone |
File Scavenger® Version 3 is a file "undelete" and data recovery utility for Windows XP®, Windows 7, Vista®, Windows Server 2003®, Windows 2000®, Windows NT® and Windows ME/98/95®. File Scavenger® can recover files that have been accidentally deleted (including files removed from the Recycle Bin, in a DOS window, from a network drive, from Windows Explorer with the SHIFT key held down) provided that recovery is attempted before the files are permanently overwritten by new data. File Scavenger® supports both basic and dynamic disks, NTFS compression, alternate data streams, sparse files, Unicode filenames, etc. Except in severe cases, both the file and the folder path leading to the file can be recovered. File Scavenger® can also recover files from a reformatted or corrupted volume even when the volume has been deleted and its original position and size are unknown. File Scavenger® can scan an entire physical hard drive to look for traces of defunct volumes. File Scavenger® uses advanced algorithms to handle disks with bad sectors and badly corrupted partitions. It can be installed on a hard drive or run from a portable storage device such as a memory stick, removable drive, CD or floppy disk. To run File Scavenger®, you must log on as a system administrator to the computer where data recovery is intended. Files can only be restored if the disk areas allocated to the files have not been overwritten by new data. All recovered files should be validated for the integrity of the recovered data. |
| Tips to recover scratched CDs | for everyone |
Don't you feel like crying every time you add another disc to your pile of scratched discs. Trashing that disc which contained your favorite songs, pics, files, games or videos is not easy.
Read-on, if you find yourself wishing for a miracle every time your fav CD is scratched
Home Remedy :
here's an easy home remedy, which might give you the desired results. Rub a small amount of toothpaste on the scratch and polish the CD with a soft cloth and any petroleum-based polishing solution (like clear shoe polish). Squirt a drop of Brasso and wipe it with a clean cloth.
Technology to the rescue
There are many softwares available on the net, which enable the recovery of the CD data. BadCopy Pro is one such software, which can be used to recover destroyed data and files from a range of media.
Just a few clicks is all it requires to recover the disc from almost all kind of damage situation; be it corrupted, lost data, unreadable or defective.
DiskDoctors is another popular company, which offers both software and solutions to recover data from a scratched CDs and DVDs
General Tips:
* Always wipe the CD from the center outward with stratight spoke-like strokes. Wiping CDs in circles will create more scratches.
* Do not scratch the graphics layer as you cannot repair the disc. HINT: Hold the disc up to a light with the graphics layer facing the light source. If you can see light thru the scratches at any point then the disc may be irreparable and or exhibit loading or playing errors.
* Clean your Disc players lens regularly with a suitable product to ensure optimal viewing pleasure.
* Make sure to use a soft, lint-free cloth to clean both sides of the disc. Wipe in a straight line from the centre of the disc to the outer edge.
* If wiping with a cloth does not remove a fingerprint or smudge, use a specialized DVD disc polishing spray to clean the disc.
* Only handle the disc by its outer edge and the empty hole in the middle. This will help prevent fingerprints, smudges or scratches.
Statistics:
*Fingermarks/prints cause 43% of disc problems!
* General wear & tear causes 25% of disc problems!
* Player-related issues cause 15% of disc problems!
* User-related issues cause 12% of disc problems!
* PlayStation 2 machine scratches cause 3% of disc problems!
* Laser rot (a manufacturer error) causes 2% of disc problems!
| IPHONE- 4TH GENERATION 4G SMARTPHONE | for everyone |
Phone Pro Concept - 4th Generation 4G Smartphone
Antonio De Rosa design a best ever Apple iPhone. This iPhone concept runs OS 3.2 and uses a sophisticated mechanism that hides two paddles with LED backlight and touch surface. The front camera on the handset is hidden inside the top paddle and you should know that this innovative design makes the iPhone more comfortable for a great gaming experience.
There's also a MagSafe power connection on the back and we have to say that this certainly looks like the perfect multimedia gaming phone, complete with 64GB of internal memory. There's a gallery of this iPhone 4G design shown over here
Antonio De Rosa design a best ever Apple iPhone. This iPhone concept runs OS 3.2 and uses a sophisticated mechanism that hides two paddles with LED backlight and touch surface. The front camera on the handset is hidden inside the top paddle and you should know that this innovative design makes the iPhone more comfortable for a great gaming experience.
There's also a MagSafe power connection on the back and we have to say that this certainly looks like the perfect multimedia gaming phone, complete with 64GB of internal memory. There's a gallery of this iPhone 4G design shown over here
| QUICK LEARNING AND UNDERSTANDING | for everyone |
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| WUDHU SHREDS YOUR SINS | for everyone |
Abu Usman says: I was sitting along with Salman-e-Farsi under a tree.
He took a dried branch of that tree and shook it, all the dried leaves dropped down.
Then Salman said to me: "You don't ask me why I have done like this?"
I said: "Why you did this?
He answered: "Once I was sitting under a tree with the Holy Prophet of Islam (pbuh). Hadhrat caught hold of a dried branch of that tree and shook it, all the dried leaves fell on the ground."
Then he (pbuh) said: "Salman! You did not ask me why I have done this action?"
I said: "Why you have done this O Messenger of Allah?"
He replied: "When a Muslim performs his Wudhu properly and then
attends to his Salaat five times a day, his sins shed in the same
manner as the dried leaves of this tree."(Biharul Anwaar)
He took a dried branch of that tree and shook it, all the dried leaves dropped down.
Then Salman said to me: "You don't ask me why I have done like this?"
I said: "Why you did this?
He answered: "Once I was sitting under a tree with the Holy Prophet of Islam (pbuh). Hadhrat caught hold of a dried branch of that tree and shook it, all the dried leaves fell on the ground."
Then he (pbuh) said: "Salman! You did not ask me why I have done this action?"
I said: "Why you have done this O Messenger of Allah?"
He replied: "When a Muslim performs his Wudhu properly and then
attends to his Salaat five times a day, his sins shed in the same
manner as the dried leaves of this tree."(Biharul Anwaar)
| DO NOT TAKE PRAYERS LIGHTLY | for everyone |
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| SALAT BETTER THAN SLEEP!!! | for everyone |
The importance of Salaat in Islam can never be over-emphasised. We have learnt from the Hadith of Rasulullah (Sallallaahu ?ayhi Wasallam) that the similitude of Salaat in the life of a Muslim is like that of the head in the human body. Just as there is no life without the head, there is no Islam without Salaat.O Muslim Brothers and Sisters: Consider these virtues of Fajr in the Masjid.!!
- Performing Fajr on its time with Jamaat is a quality of a Mumin.
Performing Fajr on its time with Jamaat and Esha as well equals the Ibadat (worship) of the whole night. - He who performs his Fajr with Jamaat is in the protection of Allah.
- There are glad tidings of perfect and complete Nur (celestial light)for him on the day of Qiyamah.
- He who awakens from his sleep and makes the Zikr of Allah, performs wudhu and performs his Fajr Salaat with Jamaat in the Masjid awakens fresh and healthy and if not, he awakens evil and lazy.
If he performs his Fajr with Jamaat he acquires multiple rewards, his rank is elevated and sins forgiven.
To perform Fajr on its time with Jamaat in the Masjid is a cause of entry into jannah and protection from the fire.
The malaa-eekah are present in the salaat of Fajr and Asr with mercy and blessings.
He who performs Fajr and Asr on time with Jamaat, will enter Jannah.
He who performs his Salaat before the rising of the sun (Fajr) and before its setting (Asr) will never enter the fire.
The angels of the night and day that are appointed over a person alternate. They gather during the Fajr and Asr Salaat. Thereafter those angels that spent their night with a person ascend (the skies) and their Rabb asks them (although He is most knowledgeable). "How did you leave My servants?" They will reply: "We left them while they were performing Salaat and we came to them while they were performing Salaat."
The harms of not performing Fajr in the Masjid with Jamaat:
It is a reported quality of a hypocrite (munafiq).
A loss of rewards and thawaabs result by not performing Fajr with Jamaat in the Masjid.
A person who sleeps until sunrise and did not perform his Fajr in the Masjid awakes evil and lazy. - A person is deprived of the benefits of good health which are acquired when awakening and performing Fajr with Jamaat in the Masjid.
A person is deprived of the obedience to Allah.
Rasulullah (Sallallaahu ?ayhi Wasallam) said with regard to a man who slept until the sun rose, "He is a person in whose ears Shaytaan has urinated."
Factors that will assist in performing Fajr: - Realise the greatness of Allah and His commandments and fear His punishment in the hereafter and in this world if He has to take one to task.
It is a great sign of Islam and a pillar from among the pillars of Islam. - Fight the nafs (carnal self) and train it to perform this fardh with eagerness, contentment and solely for the pleasure of Allah.
- Always meditate about the fact that Fajr is difficult for the munafiqeen(hypocrites).
- Sleep early. To stay awake for a permissible act but which causes one to miss Fajr is Haraam. Then what about staying awake for a haraam act and missing Fajr?
- Make a firm resolution and intention to perform Fajr with Jamaat in the Masjid, for a sleeping person is like a dead person who does not know whether he will awaken in the morning or be dead. If he did not make the intention of Fajr he will have a bad death.
- The moment you awaken for this salaat do not procrastinate; hasten immediately to perform wudhu and give up procrastination and laxity.
Realise that if you perform your salaat with Jamaat in the Masjid you will acquire rewards that cannot be measured in monetary terms and if you did not perform your Salaat you are vulnerable to the punishment of Allah. - Make sure you set your alarm and make suitable and reliable arrangements to be awakened for Salaat like asking a friend to telephone you or knock on your door or take you along for Fajr.
- Fix some punishment for yourself whenever you miss your Fajr with Jamaat like performing a certain number of Nafl Salaats, giving charity etc. so that the pinch is felt.
- Perform your Salaat before yours is performed - remember death is inevitable.
- All want the sun of Islam to rise but how can that be when the sons of Islam are fast asleep when the sun rises?
| IMAM ALI (A.S.) AND QAMBAR | for everyone |
One day our first Imam, Hazrat Ali (A.S.) went to the market with his servant, Qambar. There he bought two shirts, one which was really nice and expensive and the other which was not as nice.
When Hazrat Ali (A.S.) returned home he gave the better shirt to Qambar and kept the other one for himself.
Qambar told Hazrat Ali (A.S.) that it would look better if he wore the nicer shirt as he was the leader of the Muslims (Commander of the Faithful) while Qambar himself was only a servant.
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) answered that Qambar should wear the nicer shirt because he was younger and so it would suit him better; but more importantly Hazrat Ali (A.S.) told him that he was a guide for the Muslims and so had to set a good example for them by leading a simple life.
When Hazrat Ali (A.S.) returned home he gave the better shirt to Qambar and kept the other one for himself.
Qambar told Hazrat Ali (A.S.) that it would look better if he wore the nicer shirt as he was the leader of the Muslims (Commander of the Faithful) while Qambar himself was only a servant.
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) answered that Qambar should wear the nicer shirt because he was younger and so it would suit him better; but more importantly Hazrat Ali (A.S.) told him that he was a guide for the Muslims and so had to set a good example for them by leading a simple life.
| LOVE OF THE SAKE OF ALLAH - AS PER IMAM ALI (A.S.) | for everyone |
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) would always spend time with his children. Once he was sitting in his house with his two young children, Abbas, his son, and Zainab, his daughter.
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) said to Abbas, "Say Waahed (one)". Hazrat Ali (A.S.) then asked him to "say Isnain (Two)". Abbas replied, "I feel ashamed to utter 'two' from the same tongue which just said 'one'".
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) hugged his son, pleased at such a charming expression. The reply from Abbas indicated how deeply devoted he was in his belief inTawheed, that is, Oneness of Allah. A true believer never likes to even imagine any association with Allah.
Zainab then asked, "Dear, father, do you love me?" Hazrat Ali (A.S.) said, "Yes, of course, my children are like a part of my heart". On hearing this, she said, "You also love Allah. How can two loves be in one heart of a true believer, the love of Allah and that of children?
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) smiled and replied, "Love Allah and for the sake of His love, you love His creatures; children and fellow beings too. I love you for the sake of Allah."
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) said to Abbas, "Say Waahed (one)". Hazrat Ali (A.S.) then asked him to "say Isnain (Two)". Abbas replied, "I feel ashamed to utter 'two' from the same tongue which just said 'one'".
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) hugged his son, pleased at such a charming expression. The reply from Abbas indicated how deeply devoted he was in his belief inTawheed, that is, Oneness of Allah. A true believer never likes to even imagine any association with Allah.
Zainab then asked, "Dear, father, do you love me?" Hazrat Ali (A.S.) said, "Yes, of course, my children are like a part of my heart". On hearing this, she said, "You also love Allah. How can two loves be in one heart of a true believer, the love of Allah and that of children?
Hazrat Ali (A.S.) smiled and replied, "Love Allah and for the sake of His love, you love His creatures; children and fellow beings too. I love you for the sake of Allah."
| WEALTH - ACCORDING TO IMAM ALI (A.S.) | for everyone |
Qambar, the servant of Hazrat Ali (A.S.) relates the following incident: "Once and only once Hazrat Ali (A.S.) got annoyed with me. It was the occasion when I showed him the money that I had hoarded. It was from my share of income given to me like others from the Muslim treasury and the gift I had received from the members of his family. I had no immediate use of it and had collected the amount. It was not much, being barely 100 dirhams. When I showed him the amount he looked annoyed and what pained me more was that he looked sad.
"I enquired as to why he was so sad. He said, Qambar, if you had no use of this money, were there not people around you who were in need of it, some of them might have been starving and some ill and infirm, could you not have helped them. I never thought that you could be so heartless and cruel, and could love wealth for the sake of wealth. Qambar, I am afraid you are not trying to acquire much from Islam, try more seriously and sincerely. Take these coins out of my house."
"I took them out and distributed them amongst the beggars in Kufa mosque."
"I enquired as to why he was so sad. He said, Qambar, if you had no use of this money, were there not people around you who were in need of it, some of them might have been starving and some ill and infirm, could you not have helped them. I never thought that you could be so heartless and cruel, and could love wealth for the sake of wealth. Qambar, I am afraid you are not trying to acquire much from Islam, try more seriously and sincerely. Take these coins out of my house."
"I took them out and distributed them amongst the beggars in Kufa mosque."
| 8 DOORS OF JANNAH | for everyone |
How are the Muslims of today?
> Fajar is spent in sleep.
> Zuhr in college or at work.
> Asr in relaxing.
> Maghrib busy doing stuff.
> Ishaa watching TV.
> Jumaah salaat is only 2 rakaat, that too engrossed in worldly
> thoughts. If anyone prays tahajjud, that is considered astonishing!
>
> Please remember...
> The first question asked in the grave will be concerning namaaz.
> It is a request to everyone to invite others for namaaz. Insha-Allah,
> you will be rewarded for this!
> May Allah fulfill the legitimate wishes of the person who sends this
> message to all...Ameen!
>
> There are 8 doors of Jannat:
> 1. Jannat-ul-mava
> 2. Dar-ul-maqaam
> 3. Dar-ul-salaam
> 4. Dar-ul-khuld
> 5. Jannat-ul-adaan
> 6. Jannat-ul-naim
> 7. Jannat-ul-kasif
> 8. Jannat-ul-firdaus
> Insha-Allah, on the day of qayamat may your name be called from all
> the doors...Ameen!
>
> Islamic note...
> First farishta: Today I came so close to Allah that there were only 70
> veils between me and Allah Ta-ala.
> Second farishta: But when a momin stands for prayer, he comes so close
> to Allah that even those 70 veils are removed!!
>
> Rasool Allah ( S.A.W.) has proclaimed:
> 1.. The person who is always in a state of wazoo, Allah will increase
> his livelihood!
> 2. The person who doesn't reveal his needs to others, his needs are
> soon fulfilled!
> 3. Allah Ta-ala keeps that person healthy and happy (abaad) who after
> listening to Hadith forwards it to others!
>
> Subhan-Allah, to propagate a good thing is Sadqa Jaaria. So please
> don't let it stop...forward it to all your friends and
> relatives...Jazak-Allah.
>
> Fajar is spent in sleep.
> Zuhr in college or at work.
> Asr in relaxing.
> Maghrib busy doing stuff.
> Ishaa watching TV.
> Jumaah salaat is only 2 rakaat, that too engrossed in worldly
> thoughts. If anyone prays tahajjud, that is considered astonishing!
>
> Please remember...
> The first question asked in the grave will be concerning namaaz.
> It is a request to everyone to invite others for namaaz. Insha-Allah,
> you will be rewarded for this!
> May Allah fulfill the legitimate wishes of the person who sends this
> message to all...Ameen!
>
> There are 8 doors of Jannat:
> 1. Jannat-ul-mava
> 2. Dar-ul-maqaam
> 3. Dar-ul-salaam
> 4. Dar-ul-khuld
> 5. Jannat-ul-adaan
> 6. Jannat-ul-naim
> 7. Jannat-ul-kasif
> 8. Jannat-ul-firdaus
> Insha-Allah, on the day of qayamat may your name be called from all
> the doors...Ameen!
>
> Islamic note...
> First farishta: Today I came so close to Allah that there were only 70
> veils between me and Allah Ta-ala.
> Second farishta: But when a momin stands for prayer, he comes so close
> to Allah that even those 70 veils are removed!!
>
> Rasool Allah ( S.A.W.) has proclaimed:
> 1.. The person who is always in a state of wazoo, Allah will increase
> his livelihood!
> 2. The person who doesn't reveal his needs to others, his needs are
> soon fulfilled!
> 3. Allah Ta-ala keeps that person healthy and happy (abaad) who after
> listening to Hadith forwards it to others!
>
> Subhan-Allah, to propagate a good thing is Sadqa Jaaria. So please
> don't let it stop...forward it to all your friends and
> relatives...Jazak-Allah.
>
| Ways Of Acceptance Of Supplications | for everyone |
People who are aware of supplications narrated by Imams (a.s.) might have noticed salwaat at various places in the supplication. The scholars of ethics have the view that whenever salwaat comes in the supplication, you should know that now Imam (a.s.) wants to ask some special supplication from Allah. Also, we find salwaat in the beginning and the end of the supplications, though the above view may not be applicable here but it is for sure that it is a request in the court of Allah to bestow bounties and mercy on Hazrat Mohammad (s.a.w.s.) and his progeny (a.s.). Imam Sayyidus Saajedeen – Imam Zainul Abedeen Ali Ibne Husain (a.s) was asked about the reason about salwaat at tvatious places in supplications. He (a.s.) replied “It is very high and far from Allah that He accepts one prayer of yours i.e. salwaat and rejects your other prayers”. Even if we recite salwaat for our personal prayers then inshallah our prayers will be accepted with the condition that it should be legimate (i.e. not prohibited) and it should not be harmful for us which Allah (s.t.) knows what is best for us.
Once Hesham ibn Hakam, companion of Imam Baqir (a.s.) and Imam Sadiq (a.s.) went for Hajj. He stood in front of the Holy Kaaba with his hands raised and profusely crying and supplicating. The people gathered around him, when he completed the supplications, people congratulated him saying, “Inshallah, your supplications will be accepted.” Hisham said “I did not ask anything for myself”. The people were shocked to hear it and asked him the reason. He said, “I heard. Imam Baqir (a.s.) and Imam Sadiq (a.s.):
“When a believer prays for solution of the problems of his believing brother then the angels say to Allah to solve his problems also”. He said “My prayers can be rejected but the prayers of the angels will not be rejected.”
Dear readers, if we recite salwaat while walking, standing, sitting etc… will the angels not pray for the mercy and bounties on us?
C) If we come to know that our particular friend remembers us in his supplications then as a moral and ethical right we will also pray for his well being. Allah, the High says in the Qur’an,
“And say: Work, so Allah will see your work and (so will) His apostle and the believers (Imams (a.s.)).”
We recite the following in the Ziyarat of Holy Imams (a.s.) for seeking permission to enter.
“And I know that your prophet and your Caliph (peace be upon them) are alive near You and are getting sustenance. They are seeing my position and they are listening to my salaam and replying to my salaam…”
Dear readers, when it is our belief that they are listening to us and replying to our Salaam then when we are praying to Allah to bestow His choicest bounties on them then will they not pray at least the same dua for us.
We will not find any instance where somebody has done good work for Imam (a.s.) but have returned the obligation in a much better way. If we pay attention and observe around us, we will find that those who spend for visitation to shrines of Imam (a.s.), pay Khums etc. receive more than they have spent. In fact, the amount spent is also the bestowal of Imams (a.s.). In the words of Maulana Ghulam Askari, “the owner of the wealth has given you five rupees and is only asking a rupee back. People also do not want to part with that.” Imams (a.s.) do not keep anybody’s obligation. They know the exegeses of the verse of Surah Rehmaan much better than us.
“Is the reward of goodness aught but goodness?”
We take help of and umbrella to save ourselves from the summer heat and from the rain but we do not repose our faith on Salawaat on Hazarat Mohammad (s.a.w.s.) and his progeny for the journey of this world and hereafter. Let’s start from today the recitation of the Salawaat.
History is witness that wheter it was Hazrat Adam (a.s.) or Hazrat Nooh (a.s.) or Hazrat Ibrahim (a.s.) or any other prophets (a.s.), their supplications were accepted due to their reciting salawaat on Mohammad (s.a.w.s.) and his holy progeny (a.s). Inshallah, our supplications will also be accepted if we follow the tradition of the pas prophets (a.s.) by reciting salawaat.
Conclusion
By constantly reciting Salawaat on Mohammad (s.a.w.a) and his progeny, Allah will accept our supplications. Angels and Imams (a.s.) will pray for bounties and mercy on us.-AMEEN
(sent by son Sadiq Ali)
| THAT IS ENGINEER | for everyone |
| National Geographic Best Pictures of the year | for everyone |
National Geographic Best Pictures of the year
SENT BY BRO NAJMUDDIN
| HEIGHT OF COST CUTTING | for everyone |
EFFECTIVE APRIL 1, 2010
NEW OFFICE POLICY
Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to
your salary.
2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially
and therefore do not need a raise.
3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your
money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and
therefore you do not need a raise.
4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need
to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof
of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturdays & Sundays.
Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends,
relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend
the funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is
necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the
stalls. At the end of three minutes, a n alarm will
sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall
door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
second offense, your picture will be posted on the
company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders'
category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sectioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a
balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's
all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here
to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations,
allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management
Pass this on to all who are employed!
NEW OFFICE POLICY
Dress Code:
1) You are advised to come to work dressed according to
your salary.
2) If we see you wearing Prada shoes and carrying a Gucci bag, we will assume you are doing well financially
and therefore do not need a raise.
3) If you dress poorly, you need to learn to manage your
money better, so that you may buy nicer clothes, and
therefore you do not need a raise.
4) If you dress just right, you are right where you need
to be and therefore you do not need a raise.
Sick Days:
We will no longer accept a doctor's statement as proof
of sickness. If you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to come to work.
Personal Days:
Each employee will receive 104 personal days a year.
They are called Saturdays & Sundays.
Bereavement Leave:
This is no excuse for missing work. There is nothing you can do for dead friends,
relatives or co-workers. Every effort should be made to have non-employees attend
the funeral arrangements in your place. In rare cases where employee involvement is
necessary, the funeral should be scheduled in the late afternoon. We will be glad to
allow you to work through your lunch hour and subsequently leave one hour early.
Bathroom Breaks:
Entirely too much time is being spent in the toilet.
There is now a strict three-minute time limit in the
stalls. At the end of three minutes, a n alarm will
sound, the toilet paper roll will retract, the stall
door will open, and a picture will be taken. After your
second offense, your picture will be posted on the
company bulletin board under the 'Chronic Offenders'
category. Anyone caught smiling in the picture will be
sectioned under the company's mental health policy.
Lunch Break:
* Skinny people get 30 minutes for lunch, as they need
to eat more, so that they can look healthy.
* Normal size people get 15 minutes for lunch to get a
balanced meal to maintain their average figure.
* Chubby people get 5 minutes for lunch, because that's
all the time needed to drink a Slim-Fast.
Thank you for your loyalty to our company. We are here
to provide a positive employment experience. Therefore,
all questions, comments, concerns, complaints,
frustrations, irritations, aggravations, insinuations,
allegations, accusations, contemplations, consternation
and input should be directed elsewhere.
The Management
Pass this on to all who are employed!
We are expected to perform twice our potential while cutting coststo half...... This is the future performer ??? Height's of cost cutting |
| WHAT WOULD U CALL THESE PEOPLE | for everyone |
WHAT WOULD U CALL THESE PEOPLE
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| MEANINGFUL THOUGHTS | for everyone |
| HUMOR | for everyone |
A Gujrati, a Madrasi and a sardaar were doing construction work on
scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were having lunch and Gujju said, "Dhokla! If I get dhokla one more
time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."
The Madrasi opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Idli Sambhar again! If I
get idli sambhar one more time I'm going to jump off too."
The sardaar opened his lunch and said, "Parontha again! If I get a parontha
one more time, I'm jumping too."
The next day, the Gujju opened his lunch box, saw dhokla, and jumped to his
death.
The Madrasi opened his lunch, saw idli sambhar, and jumped, too.
Th sardaar opened his lunch, saw the parontha and jumped to his death as
well.
At the funeral, Gujju's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how
really tired he was of dhokla, I never would have given it to him again!"
The Madrasi's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him dossa! I
didn't realize he hated idli sambhar so much."
Everyone turned and stared at the sardaar's wife.
Scroll down for her answer
scaffolding on the 20th floor of a building.
They were having lunch and Gujju said, "Dhokla! If I get dhokla one more
time for lunch, I'm going to jump off this building."
The Madrasi opened his lunch box and exclaimed, "Idli Sambhar again! If I
get idli sambhar one more time I'm going to jump off too."
The sardaar opened his lunch and said, "Parontha again! If I get a parontha
one more time, I'm jumping too."
The next day, the Gujju opened his lunch box, saw dhokla, and jumped to his
death.
The Madrasi opened his lunch, saw idli sambhar, and jumped, too.
Th sardaar opened his lunch, saw the parontha and jumped to his death as
well.
At the funeral, Gujju's wife was weeping. She said, "If I'd known how
really tired he was of dhokla, I never would have given it to him again!"
The Madrasi's wife also wept and said, "I could have given him dossa! I
didn't realize he hated idli sambhar so much."
Everyone turned and stared at the sardaar's wife.
Scroll down for her answer
..
..
..
The sardaar's wife said,
"Don't look at me.
He makes his own lunch."
..
..
The sardaar's wife said,
"Don't look at me.
He makes his own lunch."
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posted by ABBAS ALAM @ 03:35
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