GENDER ROLES IN ISLAM AS BEST EXEMPLIFIED BY IMAM ALI (A.S.) AND BIBI FATIMA (S.A.)

Feb 2, '13 11:42 AM for everyone

The reality of the matter is that the problem starts at home. Whether we admit it or not, the root cause of this issue is the fact that spouses today are not treating each other as prescribed by Islam, leading to unstable and broken families. This is primarily because we are living in a culture whereby men and women are seen as identical to each other, with the only difference being a biological one of giving birth. 

Men see female roles as degrading, while women are trying to emulate men. There is no clear definition of gender roles in our society, and as a result, they are being neglected. Islam on the other hand reinforces the idea that the genders have been distinguished so that they may complement each other, and therefore a balance and equity must be maintained between them.

Gender roles in Islam – as best exemplified by Imam Ali and Lady Fatima (peace be upon them) – specify that men are the bread-winners of the family, while women are the home-makers. This does not in any way restrict a woman from getting an education or working, but what this does is give us a unique responsibility with generous rewards, which is by the order and will of Allah.

Yet more than often, it is seen Muslim women become defensive about their rights to engage in work and other out-of-the-house activities, and this is usually a direct result of being part of an ethnic culture which unjustly limits women. In the irrelevant debate of who is better – the stay-at-home mom or the full-time career mom – we are being blinded to the crucial responsibility of a wife and mother, which is to maintain that love and respect between family members and to carry out the proper Islamic upbringing of her children. 

Imam Sajjad (peace be upon him) said: "Your children's right and wrong are attributed to you, you are responsible of their fine teaching and training, guiding them to their Lord, Almighty and Glorious, and, assisting him to obey Him. Take action in teaching traditions (of the Ahlul Bayt) to your children before the corrupted persons precede in corrupting them." A mother who recognizes the importance of this obligation and successfully fulfills this responsibility towards her children is a mother with status above all, regardless of whether she does it being a part-time or full-time mom.
If today's parents complain that their children are not as they desire, then surely the fault does not entirely lie with the society we live in, and it's about time Muslim parents wake up to this duty they owe to their future generations. 

We must understand and appreciate gender roles and family values as best embodied in the examples of Imam Ali and Lady Fatima. In addition to Muslim mothers realizing their household and child-rearing responsibilities, it is just as necessary for Muslim men to respect and appreciate their wives to the fullest extent, as our Holy Prophet (peace be upon him and his progeny) has emphasized that a man's respect for women and his faith are both interlinked; when one increases or decreases, so does the other. If these fundamental family values and prescribed gender roles and responsibilities are understood, appreciated, and established between husband and wife in accordance with Islam, only then spouses will respect each other, fathers will care for their families, mothers will be concerned with raising their children properly, and children will respect and show obedience to their elders. This is what the Holy Family of Islam has taught us. This is what we call Islamic family values